My father died when I was 5, I was the oldest of 3 with two younger brothers. I always felt rejection from my mother, I believe because I look exactly like my father and I was adored by him.
My mother quickly remarried a man with severe bipolar disease, and had another daughter. My mother and half-sister are very close.
Now, after raining down 50 + years of physical and verbal abuse, my stepfather has died. My mother, half sister and brothers have made it clear to me that I am no longer a member of this family. My role has always been “the helper.” They don’t need me.
This is, of course, a bare outline but should also include extreme alcohol and drug addiction problems and religious cults involving all the siblings.
I am 60, alone and have been denied my inheritance (such as it was). Although, intellectually I believe this estrangement is for the best and long overdue, still I am devastated. I cannot seem to give up the fantasy that my mother and my family love me.