I Was Shocked!

I Was Shocked!

Every Tuesday Mama shares a personal story.
This week’s story was written by an Anonymous person

I just knew that I had everything going for me, my life was complete, and we were happy. Then all of a sudden my dreams were shattered. Once my boyfriend had taken my virginity, I found myself homeless, scared, alone, and on top of everything else PREGNANT!

I had to beat all of the odds alone, sacrificed, and struggled to make ends meet. Once my daughter was born in May of 2002, I was rushed back to the hospital Labor Day weekend with a temperature of 104.0 I was placed on a cooling blanket, with I.V’s. I was very sick and weak, not to mention terrified.

Only then to find out I had Genital Herpes. I was shocked. It took a toll on me and has changed my aspects on life, and my surroundings. I find myself wondering daily if people can notice, and are they judging me by my disease? I have learned to have faith and cope with my circumstance.

Though, I get depressed at times and often feel guilty because my daughter was also born with herpes. Life isn’t easy. I feel as if I’ve disappointed everyone, and my family. I ask myself, “Why am I such a failure?” My daughter is now 6 years old and is in the 1st grade, with a learning disability. I wonder if it may be from her antibiotics, and or because of the fact she was born with this disease.

I am a single mother facing trials everyday, but at the same time I am also learning. Trusting others isn’t an easy thing for me, and I don’t socialize very often as I would like to do, for the fear that I am being criticized, and a lot of people can be extremely judgmental. I’ve gained trust, and confidence in one person, whom we have become the best of friends, she knows all about my daughter’s and my situation, for that she shall never judge us, or turn her back on us. We are very grateful to consider her our best friend!

I’m hoping that my story will touch most readers, and to understand that when your teachers, and parents are telling you to use safe sex, PLEASE do so, because it could truly change your outlook and your life!

– Anonymous

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