The 3 H’s of Life
Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional—M. Kathleen Casey
It was my big moment. I was a young poet and was chosen to read at this well-known club in LA for a new artists’ record release party.
“Hi is this B—?”
“Yes.”
“Listen I’ve heard your work and would like for you to read at a record release party for M–, are you available? We need another poet besides you, a guy. Can you help us find someone?”
I was ecstatic. I called a guy I knew and we went and did the show.
What I know now is that there are 3 H’s to life. Humiliation, heartbreak and hardship, what I didn’t know was that this was my inauguration into one of them.
We read, the artist did their thing and just as soon as it began it was over. I left the stage with my male counterpart and started to make the rounds. This is where the humiliation began.
To the person I brought with me, “You were great! I mean you were fantastic! I loved your work!” Then their eyes fell on me, “Uh… you were good too,” and then a perfunctory pat on the shoulder. That scenario repeated itself over and over again, all night long. By the time we left, the person I brought with me had an offer to play a part in a major motion picture and a record deal. I had the same lint I brought in the bottom of my pockets.
I didn’t read in public for almost a year after that night. My already fragile artist ego was bruised. This became one of the many H’s I would collect. At the time I had no idea that life had plenty more to deal out.
How do you cope when life hands you humiliation, heartbreak or a hardship? I spent a great deal of time eating and shopping. What got me into that situation eventually got me out… writing, journaling.
What do you do when life hands you an H’?
- Aunt B
When life hands me an H, I put on my tennis shoes and go for a nice long walk. The 3 H’s can put you in a bad way if you don’t have a way to work it out. I find that walking helps me. My brother gets in his car and goes for long drives while listening to his favorite music. That works for him. Everyone gets an H every once in a while so don’t beat yourself up when it happens to you. You will survive.
I must admit, when life hands me an H, I take to my bedroom and take a nap. I know this isn’t healthy, but after I wake up, I am refreshed and ready to deal with that H. If I’m at work, I take my 15 minute break and find a quiet place to rest. Resting your mind does wonders for your soul!
My mom always told me, when you’re handed an H, take a deep breath and exhale slowly. It rejuvenates your mind. It revitalize your thoughts, and above all it gives you a chance to think before you speak!
Thanks for writing, I very much enjoyed reading your latest post. I think you should post more often, you evidently have talent for blogging!