05/26/2009
Can I have just a little…
Space?
We are born alone and we die alone. We need to spend some time alone between these two planes of existence or we become superficial people incapable of facing our real selves. We weren’t meant to be joined at the hip no matter how much we think we love someone. We all need freedom and the right to be an individual first and last. You remain one-half of a joined together couple only for so long without resenting it and being frustrated with your role.
- Mama
When I retired from my nine to five, my wife had already retired. I have always loved my freedom and the time I had to myself during my working hours and hobbies. It has been a very interesting retirement for the both of us, as my wife loves her freedom and time to herself. We find ourselves wondering outside and sitting in our patio at different times of the day. My wife visits her favorite bookstore at least once a week, where she can spend hours on end by herself. I love to get away and go fishing once a week, so our retirement is working well with the both of us, due to our different hobbies. I agree with you mama, everyone needs their own space and freedom. There are many things a couple can do together, but having that freedom brings much more happiness in the end.
I totally agree with you about having your own space. I’ve been dating a guy for more than 4 years and he seems to smother me at times. Sometimes I can’t move without him right behind me. I’m feeling frustrated about our togetherness. I would like to just have some time to myself at least a couple days out of the week. He has his own place, but he stays at mine most of the time. Thank you mama for letting me vent my frustrations!
Sometimes you do need your space. People may mean well when they want to be with you 24/7 but they don’t understand that the person they want to be with all the time might need some time, and space, to themselves. It’s like being smothered. You start to feel pressure in your own home and the only thing you can think of is getting away. The reason I know about this is because I was in a relationship that was really frustrating. At first, I thought it was nice having her around and giving me so much attention. But after a while, it started to become annoying. I couldn’t go to the bathroom by myself. She would stand by the bathroom door and wait for me to come out. Every time I went anywhere, she was there, ready to go. I had to start sneaking out of the house just to go into the back yard. When I talked to her about it, her response was that she loved me and wanted to spend every minute with me. The truth was, I loved her, too, but I couldn’t deal with being smothered all the time. What happened? I ended up moving out. It was the hardest thing I ever did, but I did. Now I feel free and I’m happy with my life. This is the first time I’ve ever written about this and it feels good getting it off my chest. Thanks for the opportunity.